A few days ago, I deleted my accounts of Behance and Pinterest. I left “I’m almost off” on the profile section of my Twitter account and then logged out. I cleaned up “About” page on this website. And finally I started to tuckle on old articles.
Why I executed all of these was because I had been caught by the cultures of hustle, self-branding and buzz. To follow these (local) trends, I stupidly decorated my blog with TOC and talking bubbles, added overly catchy titles ("[The Biggest Art Fair In Taiwan] ART TAIPEI: Kawaii Things Save The World!?" WTF…), and so on, and so on. It really made me feel bad.
One day, I realised that these online culture were not my thing. These were illusions. At least, for me.
I quickly unfollowed all the “shiny” feeds and stepped away from some social media platforms for about six months.
Now, almost a year passed since the first time I felt this. During the period, Instagram was the only my active social media platform. Since Instagram is engineered to share visual contents rather than words, it was easier for me to keeping up with this quieter place to post my artworks patiently. As the results:
- I lost 70 followers on Twitter after I stopped constant tweeting. I don’t care.
- I got 30 followers on Instagram in a few days after BlenderArtists picked up my artwork (Thanks all!). Well done.
My feelings are still not changed. So, now I understand what platforms are peaceful and what are toxic. I think now is the time to change my online emvironment drastically. But, in my case, there is always a shadow of yet another temptation.
Since I’m autistic, my way of consentration is terrible. When I’m into a thing, I usually don’t get tired by spending 90% of freetime everyday to get knowledge about it. In this situation, seeing myself from the third person’s view to determine if the reason why I’m doing this is because of true passion or because of temptation is extremely hard. Usually I test myself for three to six months to make it clear and it’s enough. But sometimes I’m enchanted for several years and then suddenly lose interest completely…
Even though, I’m sure that such cultures are not for me, anyway. Things what I like for one to two decades prove my feelings. When you got lost, then get back to basics.